stress and your relationship

Stress has an impact on relationships and vice versa

Problems in your relationship can cause an enormous amount of stress, either through a drip-drip effect or a crisis, such as an affair. Avoiding issues may mean short-term relief, but long-term could cause increasing resentment.

Conversely, stresses from sources outside the relationship will affect the way that you feel and consequently your relationship.

Your partner may well be able to provide you with the support you need, but if long term, this may be at a cost, so it is important to keep the channels of communication open and him/her how much you appreciate that support. It could also be that he/she is just not available, because of their own emotional state of mind, through adverse family circumstances, stress at work, or because your relationship is already in decline.

Stress and your relationship

See also:

International Stress

Management Association

Symptoms of anxiety are often much reduced after even a couple of sessions with a qualified Human Givens therapist. Phobias and traumas can often be treated in just a couple of sessions using a safe and non-intrusive technique, during which you stay in control.

Anxiety, phobia and trauma

Relationship counsellors are uniquely equipped to help you find a way of dealing with conflict in other relationships too, as they are used to see an individual's problems in the context of their relationships with other people in their life. See also: Dealing with criticism, Listen so people talk and Win-win negotiation.

Stress through problems with other people

Psychological health depends to a large extend on whether we can have our most basic needs met in balance, by appropriately using our innate resources. If we adopt a pro-active approach to our psychological well-being, than we are more likely to be able to manage our stress levels. A Human Givens therapist uses a wide approach, including hypnotherapy; as well as helping you to assess whether you needs are met in balance and whether you are making the most of your innate resources, he/she will also teach you to relax deeply

Human givens and tackling stress

Talk about what you both have, and have achieved in all areas of your life. Write it all down and do not judge: this is your starting block (including 'ordinary' every day achievements).

Decide what you are going to do to build on that

Break your goals down into small steps

Ask for help if necessary.

Take stock

Stress caused by situations at work include:

Work-related stress

Too much work - too little time, disturbed life-work balance

Lack of understanding of difficulties at home

(that does not include your employer wanting you to take personal responsibility for seeking a solution!)

Bullying www.workplacebullying.co.uk

Fairness issues

Discrimination

Coping with stress as a couple

Your partner cannot read your mind - tell him/her what the problem is (use the above mentioned pages).

Visit the page on stress and anxiety and to learn more - it is easier to deal with something that is recognisable.

Resolve to really pay attention to your worries once or twice a day Write down your thoughts in 'never to be sent letters', mind maps, flow charts, etc. during that time, this will help you to distance yourself

For the rest of the day divert your attention, reassuring yourself that you are going to give those worries proper attention at that time.

If you are stressed:

If your partner is stressed, encourage (not force) him/her to do the above.

Accept that your partner is going to react and problem solve differently than you would. You might not like it or understand it!

Act like a sounding board and refrain from making judgements

Ask if he/she would like advice, before you give it